She blinked. What a strange thought. What is an “I”?
I am I.
The thought was familiar, and that familiarity came with a pleasant buzz. It was good, being an “I.”
She stretched, limbs sighing open as a breeze shifted the branches of the tree she was companion to. A bird fluttered nearby, disturbed by the wind, and she took the opportunity to move, her form shifting to match the smaller creature.
She stayed with the bird for the rest of the day, flitting along the ground in concert with her winged guide. As the sun set, she was able to drift more freely, no longer bound by individual plants and animals. As she glided along the earth, more strange, yet familiar thoughts shifted in and out of her consciousness.
Who am I?
I follow. I am…I follow.
What do I want?
Gnosis. Darkness. Follow. Follow. Follow.
The world shifts and she expands, growing into a new dimension. Stepping out of a puddle of darkness she raises her arms. And they are her arms. She hasn’t had arms of her own for a while. She twists and turns her strange, three-dimensional body, stepping freely about. A shiver of delight runs through her and more memories return.
The name comes with no images or specific memories, but it piques her curiosity.
It’s nearby. She knows instinctively it is why she has changed into this bizarre, solid thing. And she knows she has been there before. What was before? Before…
tearing, teeth, pain, desperation, fear
She drops to her knees, clutching herself tightly as the rush of emotions pours through her. She fights them back, rejecting the horrid complexity of such feelings.
Something ate her.
Almost. Most. Something ate most of her. Something ate so much of her that it killed these parts of her that she is now, finally, regrowing. The “I” parts. The wanting parts. The fear and joy and curiosity parts. A new emotion enters. Anger.
Her mouth opens and her chest expands as she takes air into her form. She pushes the air out a moment later. It is a weird sensation, taking a bit of the world into her own self. The strangeness of it distracts her, and she breathes again. The edges soften in her mind, a welcome dulling of such sharp, stabbing thoughts.
She eases herself back to her feet, and after a moment of hesitation, carefully returns to the emotions. She tastes each one as it slides through her until they no longer make her weird form tremble and shudder.
This is a part of being.
She looks up at Luna and smiles, the sheer delight of being lightening her mood once more.
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